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It's so nice outside!

Yesterday I was cleaning for an elderly woman from my church. After 15 minutes of her non-stop complaining about my cleaning (interspersed with "But I a really am satisfied with your work), I was fighting back tears. I didn't actually cry. She doesn't know me well enough to notice that I was on the edge of tears.

I think she could tell I was frustrated though when I finally said: "June, I understand that it is frustrating for you to not be able to clean your own home. I understand that you have particular ways of doing things. But I have tried every suggestion you've ever given me, and without fail, a few months later you are upset again, despite the fact that I have continually switched my methods according to your requests. If you choose to not be satisfied and to find fault all the time, then it doesn't matter what I do or don't do, you will be dissatisfied because that's the position you've chosen. I will incorporate the things you've mentioned to me today. I don't honestly think they will make a difference, but I will try them. Beyond that, I really don't know what else to tell you." Her home got a VIGOROUS clean as I burned off steam....
And at the end she thanked me, and told me she was looking forward to seeing me again in two weeks.
A few people now have told me that I need to quit cleaning for this lady, because the hassle is just not worth the $15/hr (for 2 hours every 2 weeks). But having the extra cash really is helpful. AND I would feel so guilty if I stopped cleaning for her - She needs the help - And I wouldn't ask anyone else to take my place if I wasn't willing to do it myself - And when I came back from Ghana one of the things I realized is that work is a priviledge, so it seems rather shallow and prideful to give this up simply because I can't be bothered with the hassle. Anywhooo.

From cleaning I went home to get showered and then head into the office, where I was working on the dreaded school assignment. Where I was faced again with the situation of 'no matter how much I adjust, rearrange, and try to accommodate, the person I answer to is still not satisfied.'

Is God trying to teach me a lesson here? Patience perhaps? Humility? Flexibility?

BUT the weather has been lovely the last couple days. The sidewalks are dry so I've been walking to work. I feel pretty happy all things considered.

Looming deadline

On February 22nd (the due date) I electronically submitted my literature review assignment to my prof. She couldn't open the PDF, so I sent it again in multiple electronic formats, and put a copy in the mail.

On Monday March 19th I received it back from my professor in the mail.

I had a (knowledgeable) friend read it for me, and sorted out what things I can do to make it clearer, because my prof still isn't understanding and wants parts one and two re-written (I have NEVER had this much trouble with an assignment!).

Next step is the actual methodology - what population I will be studying, what questions I will ask, etc. ... this portion is due on Thursday. THIS Thursday the 29th. If I had realized this on the 19th when I received the assignment back (instead of today when I thought to check!), I would have had 10 days to write step one for the third time, step two for the second time, and design step three based on what I hope will be acceptable steps one and two.

Can you guess what I'll be working on this week? Don't think this will make me blog any less though.... you know where I come to vent!

A Dudla?

I found this at mothering.com I think it's a spoof???

Phone first

I thought that just to be on the safe side, I should phone (text) before driving 45 minutes. Good thing I did because there is too much going on at their new place so no party today. I'm back to my plan of tidying and organizing around home. (After I watch the Wizard of Oz perhaps)

I did have a plan...

According to my day-timer, I was going to attend a free yoga workshop today. When that was done I'd have an hour before needing to drive ~45 minutes to a "Yeah! we survived the move party", for the young person I wrote about on March 12.

BUT... as I was laying in bed listening to the radio this morning, I forgot this plan. As I checked e-mail etc I forgot the plan. As I thought through the cleaning and organizing I was going to do at home today, I forgot the plan. As I made brunch I forgot the plan. It was noon when I looked at the clock and said to myself "Am I forgetting something?" "Oh yes! I did have a plan for today!" Fortunately I remembered this BEFORE I would be late for this afternoon's party. No more hanging about in pj's for me!

Foxmarks

I use Mozilla Firefox as my internet browser. It comes with cool "add-ons". One of these add-ons is called Foxmarks. It is a way to synchronize your bookmarks between computers. WooHoo! My computer bookmarks are so organized now! I Like being organized.

What else is new? I'm sure other things of note have occurred.... I've even thought to myself over the last few days "I should go blog about that" But then I get side-tracked with other stuff. (And no, it's not facebook that is distracting me!)

I finally read "Wicked". It turns your whole understanding of "The Wizard of Oz" on its head. My room-mate has the WOF movie; I need to watch it again one of these days. I think it will be a whole different story with Wicked playing as the backdrop in my head.

I'm currently reading "Women's Bodies Women's Wisdom" and loving every page. It was a really good follow-up to "Taking Charge of Your Fertility", which I've just finished reading (I started it ages ago, then loaned it out, and only recently got around to reading it all myself). Speaking of which, as I read TCOYF, I kept wishing that there was a youth version, so that teens and young women could have access to this fabulous information about their bodies. Because as good as TCOYF is, you have to be motivated to get through it. Lo and behold, this week I discovered that in October2006, the author published "Cycle Savvy: The Smart Teens Guide to the Mysteries of Her Body". I have one or two young women in mind for a copy already...

A new baby bunny is coming to live at the apartment soon. It will be a 'pet' for my room-mates Flemish Giant bunny which she is also waiting for. Two fluff bundles to squish and love. :)

That's all I can think of for now.

Some rambling thoughts which may not be 100% clear... I'm thinking 'aloud'.

I was involved in a conversation today which included the topics of divorce, abortion, and homosexuality. I mostly stayed quiet because I knew as soon as I started asking questions the sh*t was gonna fly and I wasn't in the mood for that.

I believe that the things you focus on, multiply. If not literally, then at the very least in terms of the amount of energy and space they consume in your life. If you are always focused on 'fighting' those things you don't agree with, then you are actually INCREASING their presence in your life - the opposite of what you wanted to do! But if you focus on doing the positive things which are part of who you are and what you believe, then THEY will increase, effectively crowding out the negatives you disagree with. You're still 'fighting the good fight' then, but you're doing it in a way that promotes the positive. In Lynn Paltrow's article "Towards a real culture of life", she concludes by saying:

The time has come to move away from divisive (and inaccurate) “pro-life” and “pro-choice” categorizations and stand together. We need broad based support for laws and policies that genuinely promote a culture of life—one that includes and values the women who give that life.

I think that many of the divisive hot topics in society at large, and within the Christian faith, are actually red herrings. They are little fish which as we fight them, distract us from the real issues. Energy we spend on fighting the red herrings, is energy we're not giving to love our neighbours as ourselves, or to promote a culture of Life.

My emotional roller coaster

I just finished meeting with a young person I hadn't seen in a long while. On the plus side, she is no longer cutting, doing E (among other things), or stealing to support her habit. She is going back to school and moving into a new house out of town with her mom & boyfriend.

On the downside, she is still smoking pot and drinking, and having a lot of unprotected sex. I asked if she had considered talking to her doctor about bc options because unprotected sex is pretty risky. (and that's a HUGE understatement for her situation!) She said "I know. My mom says that too. But I haven't got pregnant yet so we'll be fine." She was not open to discuss the issue further. *Sigh*


I feel really worn out. ....So happy that she contacted me after months of silence. ....So sad that she was hurting. She would sometimes stand outside my apartment when she was high, trying to work up the courage to knock on my door.

I'm not sure what else to say right now.

Easy

Today is International Woman's Day. Even if you didn't do something 'big' to mark the day, you can still do something small.

Homeless/Women's shelters provide things like tp and diapers etc, but menstrual products often get overlooked. If you go here you can make a "virtual donation" (i.e. it doesn't cost you anything) and Seventh Generation will send a free pack of chlorine-free pads or organic cotton tampons to a woman's shelter in the state or province you select.

Quote on CBC just now:

(from a guy who spent time in Haiti)

"I don't believe in voodoo. But I'm not above using it if it suits my purposes."

If you don't believe in it... why would you 'use it'?

WooHoo

Lately I've been thinking a lot about how to increase my visibility (and therefore business) as a doula. Now that I am certified, have a good brochure, and a basic webpage, I'm ready to start sending out information to the doctors offices, schools, and various agencies around the county.

There is also an event coming up April 21 and 22 called "Ask a Doula". It is sponsored by CAPPA Canada, and my participation will mean that I'll have a booth in Walmart from 10am-3pm both days, where customers can ask me questions. CAPPA and "Ask A Doula" will do all the promo work. They'll provide the booth and materials and even a t-shirt. All it costs me is the $45 to be a CAPPA member. Good easy publicity!! Being a CAPPA member also gets me a referral page on their website, their newsletter, free attendance at CAPPA conferences, and discounts on CAPPA Canada events (and attendance at CAPPA conerences can provide me with CEU's for my DONA recertification).

Also, we have a military base nearby (well, relatively near anyhow) which runs a volunteer doula program (all CAPPA doulas). I called today to find out about helping with it and it turns out the timing is perfect! Most of their doulas have moved to other bases (they were military wives) and so the doula program had kinda fizzled. But three new doulas were trained a couple weeks ago, and a new co-ordinator is putting together a first meeting so that the doula program can get off the ground again. I am coming in on the ground floor, and can have an impact on how the program will evolve. !!!! It is a volunteer position, however your basic expenses are covered (which is more than some places do when you volunteer!)

I am very very happy now. I can't WAIT to see how this all turns out.

Now is the time ladies!

While the timing is unfortunate for me, who ordered more Lunapads last week before they went on sale, for those of you have been thinking about ordering but wondering about the cost, everything is 20% off until March 9th! Go check it out!